Category: Unlearning

Women who sleep with my boyfriend, then have the cheek to comment on my sexual history will be verbally decimated. There is nothing that will get a woman more angry than finding out she’s being cheated on. Oh wait, how about his side chick calling her promiscuous. “He thought that because you’ve slept with so many more […]

Just keep on walking buddy, you’re not getting another run at this. Every now and then a guy will resurface on my whatsapp, or chat, that I’d completely forgotten about. You know ‘dem ones.’ The mandatory maintenance text that outwardly says ‘sup’ but means ‘I haven’t forgot you. We could still hook up.’ The situationship. […]

The future looks more like the past than the past did. When I was a kid, I thought that in 2005 I would have those self lacing hi-tops from Back to the Future and be living in a Jetsons style apartment in space. The technological advancements have been amazing. Even if I do seem remarkably underwhelmed a […]

Period, period, period, period, period. Are you comfortable with it yet? When I was 17 years old I tried to send my brother to the local pharmacy because I needed tampons. Before he could step out of the door I could hear a mumbled conversation and then a resounding WHAT, before he was loudly told […]

Goodbye Europe. I always loved being inside you. Since Thursday’s vote I’ve been a whirlwind of emotions. Mainly disbelief and embarrassment. I didn’t vote for Cameron and can’t say I’m sorry to see him go. But I was able to put my personal feelings aside to vote for something I believed in. A unified Europe. Unlike […]

I think I am 95% desensitised to penis. When I was younger and I used to worry that my enjoyment of uber violent films meant that I could find myself in a Die Hard style scenario, and would simply sellotape a pen knife to my back and throw myself into the mix without batting an eyelid. It was […]

Life, or something a lot like it Last month on My Life: I got a job. I started a course. I downloaded Tinder. Again. I quit the job. I finished the course. I deleted Tinder. Again. Despite the boring summary, I feel like things have changed. Albeit microscopically. Instead of putting the same effort into a CV as I […]